end of life doula
Message Received
As originally published for The Convenings on 8/17/18 “I heard my mother talking to me yesterday,” a client recently told me. “I was half asleep and I had just been talking about her, so it was probably nothing. I’m sure it was just a dream,” her tone quieted in the telling and her brow…
Read MoreThe Playfulness of the Unknown
As originally published for The Convenings on 7/23/18 The other night, while enjoying dinner with my dad and bonus mom on the deck sweetly nestled in the treetops of the woods behind our house, we chatted about our dogs and the grief of outliving them when our love together runs so deep. As the stories…
Read MoreA Space for Grace to Enter
As originally published for The Convenings on 6/16/18 The stillness of a recent early summer morning found me in the garden. As I tended and planted and otherwise lost myself in creation, I heard rustling behind me and turned to find my dog Ritter belly up, rolling around in my iris garden. “No!” I…
Read MorePracticing for Death
It’s been 10 days since I arrived in Germany to companion my friend as she receives treatment for metastatic breast cancer. Originally, we were to fly her home to Florida this Sunday — three days from now. As it is, the doctor requested that she stay for another round of hyperthermia and chemo before she…
Read MoreCreative Engagement
I am departing today for Germany, taking my heart across the ocean in service of a dear friend receiving treatment for metastatic breast cancer. As I sit at the airport on this overcast morning looking out on the tarmac, at people coming and going, I’m feeling a strange combination of excitement and sobriety for the…
Read MoreSaying Yes
Twenty-two years ago when we met in Shiatsu school, Laura and I became fast friends. Not only did we share a love of bodywork, soul work, and a heart-centered writing practice, we both believed in the body’s natural ability to heal when supported by positive thoughts, positive energy, and a nurturing environment. It didn’t matter that…
Read MoreStories
Last night, a dear friend and I went to see Jonatha Brooke’s My Mother Has 4 Noses at The Jungle Theater. This one-woman musical play is a masterpiece, an exploration of devotion and loss, loyalty and heartbreak, and the remarkable things we do for love. Words cannot describe how wrapped up in it I became…
Read MoreWitnessing
I’m in a place in winter where I ride the tension between what is and what will be. It’s a fine line. My body reacts by getting antsy to be outside free of layers to shelter against the cold, to be not only generating warmth but surrounded by it. As it is, I feel within…
Read MoreThe Return
I have been waiting for this day. After a walk in the dark around the neighborhood with my husband and pup, after a breakfast of sweet potatoes, kale and scrambled eggs, after filling the bird feeder at the window, I feel the words coming. Percolating in a way they haven’t for a while. Not because…
Read MoreUse Your Light
Happy New Year! This time of year is always exciting and rich for me, giving thanks for all that transpired in the previous year, and visioning for the year to come. I’m not a resolution setter. Many years ago I discovered that the way to stay close to what is most meaningful and important for…
Read MoreBest Laid Plans
Death comes on its own timetable. As an end of life doula, you wouldn’t expect this to surprise me. Yet, it does. Every time. I was reminded of this truth most recently while companioning a woman in her late fifties. For more than three months we had been creating her vigil plan — a list of music she wanted played, poems…
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